The too many commitments we make, in the workplace, family or social, often lead us to arrive at the weekend exhausted. One of the worst aspects is the lack of space for ourselves, of moments of relaxation or rest: time to enjoy our company.
These are the results of “super commitments”, a negative habit that ends up undermining our health. That’s why today we give you this advice: avoid too many commitments and dedicate yourself, first of all, to yourself.
We are convinced that if we do not participate in all the meetings, initiatives or outings of the groups we belong to, if we disappoint others, we will end up being sidelined. If this situation begins to weigh and create discomfort, it is important to stop and reflect and slow down.
Making too many commitments and not knowing how to be alone
Being always present to everything can denote a lack of assertiveness; sometimes saying “no” makes us feel bad, even when it is obviously the healthiest choice. The tendency to be everywhere could also be linked to the obsessive need to please others or to the fear of being alone with ourselves.
Several studies warn us: the social gatherings we take part in outnumber those that our parents used to. Instead of taking advantage of free time for idleness or to rest, in short, to disconnect from stress, we aggravate it due to conformity or neglect of ourselves.
We must be our priority
Who do we want to please by making too many commitments? Ourselves or others? Answering this question in total sincerity will save us a load of stress and, therefore, of malaise.
Sometimes we need to prioritize ourselves and know how to say “no”. We cannot always meet the expectations of others and set our own aside. It is certainly not a question of isolating ourselves or distancing ourselves from acquaintances and friends, but of maintaining healthy bonds, with sufficient space for ourselves.
Too many commitments or free time stress?
Free time is necessary to be happy and above all serene. The brain needs to disconnect a few hours, stop working. Hobbies are a good way to have fun and rest. However, free time can also become a source of stress, insecurity, duties and commitments.
Dutch psychologist Ad Vingerhoets, a professor at the University of Tilburg, decided to analyze a personal problem of his: he only got sick on weekends. So he asked other people if the same thing happened to them and some of them said yes. They mostly fell ill during the summer holidays, at Christmas or on Fridays.
On the other hand, the psychologist María Jesús González, on this subject affirms that “we are not facing a real disease. It is an alteration but not well-typed, so there are no specific therapies. ” However, it is now well known that stress weakens the immune system and leisure syndrome is just another way to name one of the subtypes of anxiety.
As we have perhaps all experienced, to enjoy leisure time we must be realistic with ourselves and with the activities we are able to accomplish. We need to devise a sensible schedule and not collect assets. Finally, never forget the benefits of moments of complete idleness, the so-called “dolce far niente”. Commit yourself to yourself.